Random Messages from Friends — Java
A good friend of mine recently abandoned his dissertation on the dialectics of desire to learn about the exciting world of software development. Here’s a recent message:
So I’m going to try to fix my Swing troubles by using net beans
it’s kinda cheating if it works
only in this bizarre field could a sentence fragment like “try to fix my Swing troubles by using net beans” make sense, that’s worse than fisolophy
Skinner: Well, I was wrong. The lizards are a godsend.
Lisa: But isn’t that a bit short-sighted? What happens when we’re overrun by lizards?
Skinner: No problem. We simply unleash wave after wave of Chinese needle snakes. They’ll wipe out the lizards.
Lisa: But aren’t the snakes even worse?
Skinner: Yes, but we’re prepared for that. We’ve lined up a fabulous type of gorilla that thrives on snake meat.
Lisa: But then we’re stuck with gorillas!
Skinner: No, that’s the beautiful part. When wintertime rolls around, the gorillas simply freeze to death.
Comment by http://mylid.net/ianbrown — April 8, 2007 @ 6:17 pm
Dr. Perceptron: Greetings. I am Dr. Perceptron. Let me give you something to help you relax.
Fry: Look! There’s been a terrible mistake. I’m a human being. See? I’m all squishy and flabby. Also, I complain a lot.
Dr. Perceptron: Yes, you do. You need to relax more. Terrific. Now, consider the following: You were admitted to this robot asylum. Therefore, you must be a robot. Diagnosis complete.
Fry: I do other human stuff! I age! See?
Nurse Ratchet: I’m Nurse Ratchet. Please come with me, won’t you?
Hairbot: I’m a pretty girl. I’m a pretty girl. I’m a pretty girl.
Bender: Whoa! Someone had a busy day.
Fry: My roommate exploded. Oh, you gotta help me, Bender. How can I prove I’m human?
Bender: You could drop dead. That’d show ‘em.
Fry: I don’t wanna!
Comment by Eugene — April 9, 2007 @ 9:48 pm